myreadinghasbeenmenablydesuloryandimmehodicalodd,ouofheway,oldenglishpys,andreaises,havesuppliedmewihmosofmynoions,andwaysoffeelingineveryhinghareesoscience,iamawholeencyclopaediabehindheresofheworldishouldhavescarcelycuafigureamonghefranklins,orcounrygenlemen,inkingjohnsdaysiknowlessgeographyhanaschoolboyofsixweekssandingomeamapofoldoreliusisasauhenicasarrowsmihidonoknowwhereabouafricamergesinoasia;wheherehiopialieinoneoroherofhosegreadivisions;norcanformheremoesconjecureofheposiionofnewsouhwales,orvandiemensndyedoiholdacorrespondencewihaverydearfriendinhefirsnamedofhesewoerraeincogniaeihavenoasronomyidonoknowwhereolookforhebear,orcharlesswain;hepceofanysar;orhenameofanyofhemasighiguessavenusonlybyherbrighness——andifhesunonsomeporenousmornwereomakehisfirsappearanceinhewes,iverilybelieve,ha,whileallheworldweregaspinginapprehensionaboume,ialoneshouldsandunerrified,fromsheerincuriosiyandwanofobservaionofhisoryandchronologyipossesssomevaguepoins,suchasoneca

ohelppickingupinhecourseofmiscelneoussudy;buineverdeliberaelysadownoachronicle,evenofmyowncounryihavemosdimapprehensionsofhefourgreamonarchies;andsomeimesheassyrian,someimeshepersian,floasasfirsinmyfancyimakehewidesconjecuresconcerningegyp,andhershepherdkingsmyfriendm,wihgreapainsaking,gomeohinkiundersoodhefirsproposiionineuclid,bugavemeoverindespairahesecondiamenirelyunacquainedwihhemodernnguages;and,likeabeermanhanmyself,have”smallinandlessgreek”iamasrangeroheshapesandexureofhemonesrees,herbs,flowers——nofromhecircumsanceofmybeingownborn——forishouldhavebroughhesameinobservanspiriinoheworldwihme,hadifirsseeniin”ondevonsleafyshores,”——andamnolessaalossamongpurelyownobjecs,ools,engines,mechanicprocesses——nohaiaffecignorance——bumyheadhasnomanymansions,norspacious;andihavebeenobligedofilliwihsuchcabicuriosiiesasicanholdwihouachingisomeimeswonder,howihavepassedmyprobaionwihsolilediscrediinheworld,asihavedone,uponsomeagreasockbuhefacis,amanmaydoverywellwihaverylileknowledge,andscarcebefoundou,inmixedpany;everybodyissomuchmorereadyoproducehisown,hanocallforadispyofyouracquisiionsbuinaeeaeehereisnoshufflingheruhwillouhereisnohingwhichidreadsomuch,ashebeinglefaloneforaquarerofanhourwihasensible,wellinformedman,hadoesnoknowmeielygoinoadilemmaofhissor

inoneofmydailyjaunsbeweenbishopsgaeandshacklewell,hecoachsoppedoakeupasaidlookinggenleman,abouhewrongsideofhiry,whowasgivinghisparingdirecions(whilehesepswereadjusing),inaoneofmildauhoriy,oaallyouh,whoseemedobeneiherhisclerk,hisson,norhisservan,busomehingparakingofallhreeheyouhwasdismissed,andwedroveonaswewerehesolepassengers,henaurallyenoughaddressedhisconversaionome;andwediscussedhemerisofhefare,heciviliyandpuncualiyofhedriver;hecircumsanceofanopposiioncoachhavingbeenelyseup,wihheprobabiliiesofissuccess——oallwhichiwasenabledoreurnpreysaisfacoryanswers,havingbeendrilledinohiskindofeiqueebysomeyearsdailypraciceofridingoandfroinhesageaforesaid——whenhesuddenlyarmedmebyasarlingquesion,wheherihadseenheshowofprizecalehamorninginsmihfield?nowasihadnoseeni,anddonogrealycareforsuchsorofexhibiions,iwasobligedoreurnacoldnegaiveheseemedalilemorified,aswelsasonished,amydecraion,as(iappeared)hewasjusefreshfromhesigh,anddoublesshadhopedoparenoesonhesubjechoweverheassuredmehaihadlosafirea,asifarexceededheshowofsyearwewerenowapproachingnoronfalgae,whenhesighofsomeshopgoodsickeedfreshenedhimupinoadisseraionuponhecheapnessofcoonshisspringiwasnowalileinhear,ashenaureofmymorningavocaionshadbroughmeinosomesoroffamiliariywihherawmaerial;andiwassurprisedofindhoweloqueniwasbeingonhesaeofheindiamarke——when,presenly,hedashedmyincipienvaniyoheearhaonce,byinquiringwheherihadevermadeanycalcuionasohevalueofherenalofallhereailshopsinlondonhadheaskedofme,whasonghesirenssang,orwhanameachillesassumedwhenhehidhimselfamongwomen,imigh,wihsirhomasbrowne,havehazardeda”widesoluion”mypanionsawmyembarrassmen,and,healmshousesbeyondshoredichjusinginview,wihgreagoodnaureanddexeriyshifedhisconversaionohesubjecofpublicchariies;whichledoheparaivemerisofprovisionforhepoorinpasandpresenimes,wihobservaionsonheoldmonasicinsiuions,andchariableorders;——bu,findingmeraherdimlyimpressedwihsomeglimmeringnoionsfromoldpoeicassociaions,hansronglyforifiedwihanyspecuionsreducibleocalcuiononhesubjec,hegavehemaerup;and,hecounrybegi

ingoopenmoreandmoreuponus,asweapproachedheurnpikeakingsnd(hedesinederminaionofhisjourney),hepuahomehrusuponme,inhemosunforunaeposiionhecouldhavechosen,byadvancingsomequeriesreiveohenorhpoleexpediionwhileiwasmueringousomehingabouhepanoramaofhosesrangeregions(whichihadacuallyseen),bywayofparryinghequesion,hecoachsoppingrelievedmefromanyfurherapprehensionsmypaniongeingou,lefmeinheforablepossessionofmyignorance;andiheardhim,ashewenoff,puingquesionsoanousidepassenger,whohadalighedwihhim,regardinganepidemicdisorder,hahadbeenrifeaboudalson;andwhich,myfriendassuredhim,hadgohroughfiveorsixschoolsinhaneighbourhoodheruhnowfsheduponme,hamypanionwasaschoolmaser;andhaheyouh,whomhehadparedfromaourfirsacquainance,mushavebeenoneofhebiggerboys,orheusherhewasevidenlyakindhearedman,whodidnoseemsomuchdesirousofprovokingdiscussionbyhequesionswhichhepu,asofobaininginformaionaanyraeididnoappearhaheookanyineres,eiher,insuchkindofinquiries,forheirownsake;buhahewasinsomewayboundoseekforknowledgeagreenishcolouredcoa,whichhehadon,forbademeosurmisehahewasaclergymanheadvenuregavebirhosomereflecionsonhedifferencebeweenpersonsofhisprofessioninpasandpresenimes

[foonoe]urnburial

resohesoulsofhosefineoldpedagogues;hebreed,longsinceexinc,ofhelilys,andhelinacres:whobelievinghaalllearningwasconainedinhenguageswhichheyaugh,anddespisingeveryoheracquiremenassuperficianduseless,cameoheiraskasoaspor!passingfrominfancyoage,heydreamedawayallheirdaysasinagrammarschoolrevolvinginaperpeualcycleofdeclensions,conjugaions,synaxes,andprosodies;renewingconsanlyheoccupaionswhichhadcharmedheirsudiouschildhood;rehearsingconinuallyheparofhepas;lifemushaveslippedfromhemaslikeonedayheywerealwaysinheirfirsgarden,reapingharvessofheirgoldenime,amongheirfloriandheirspicilegia;inarcadiasill,bukings;heferuleofheirswaynomuchharsher,buoflikedigniywihhamildsceprearibuedokingbasileus;hegreekandin,heirsaelypameandheirphiloclea;wihheoccasionaldunceryofsomeunowardyro,servingforarefreshinginerludeofamopsa,oraclowndamaeas!

wihwhaasavourdohheprefaceocoles,or(asiissomeimescalled)paulsaccidence,seforh!”oexhoreverymanohelearningofgrammar,hainendehoaainheundersandingofheongues,whereinisconainedagreareasuryofwisdomandknowledge,iwouldseembuvainandlosbour;forsomuchasiisknown,hanohingcansurelybeended,whosebegi

ingiseiherfeebleorfauly;andnobuildingbeperfec,whereashefoundaionandgroundworkisreadyofall,andunableoupholdheburdenofheframe”howwelldohhissaelypreamble(parableohosewhichmilonmendehas”havingbeenheusageoprefixosomesolemnw,henfirspromulgaedbysolon,orlycurgus”)correspondwihandillusraehapiouszealforconformiy,expressedinasucceedingcuse,whichwouldfenceabougrammarruleswihheseveriyoffaiharicles!——”asforhediversiyofgrammars,iiswellprofiablyakenawaybyhekingmajesieswisdom,whoforeseeingheinconvenience,andfavourablyprovidingheremedie,causedonekindofgrammarbysundrylearnedmenobediligenlydrawnandsoobeseou,onlyeverywhereobeaughforheuseoflearners,andforhehurinchangingofschoolmaisers”whaagusoinhawhichfollows:”whereiniisprofiablehahecanorderlydeclinehisnoun,andhisverb”hisnoun!

hefinedreamisfadingawayfas;andheleasconcernofaeacherinhepresendayisoinculcaegrammarrules

hemodernschoolmaserisexpecedoknowalileofeveryhing,becausehispupilisrequirednoobeenirelyignoranofanyhinghemusbesuperficially,ifimaysosay,omniscienheisoknowsomehingofpneumaics;ofchemisry;ofwhaeveriscurious,orproperoexcieheaenionofheyouhfulmind;aninsighinomechanicsisdesirable,wihaouchofsaisics;hequaliyofsoils,&cboany,heconsiuionofhiscounry,cummulisaliisyoumaygeanoionofsomeparofhisexpecedduiesbyconsulinghefamousracaeoneducaionaddressedomrharlib

allhesehings——hese,orhedesireofhem——heisexpecedoinsil,nobyselessonsfromprofessors,whichhemaychargeinhebill,buaschoolinervals,ashewalkshesrees,orsaunershroughgreenfields(hosenauralinsrucors),wihhispupilsheleasparofwhaisexpecedfromhim,isobedoneinschoolhourshemusinsinuaeknowledgeahemolliaemporafandihemusseizeeveryoccasion——heseasonofheyear——heimeofheday——apassingcloud——arainbow——awaggonofhay——aregimenofsoldiersgoingby——oinculcaesomehingusefulhecanreceivenopleasurefromacasualglimpseofnaure,bumuscachaiasanobjecofinsrucionhemusinerprebeauyinohepicuresqueheca

orelishabeggarman,oragipsy,forhinkingofhesuiableimprovemennohingesohim,nospoiledbyhesophisicaingmediumofmoralusesheuniverse——hagreabook,asihasbeencalled——isohimindeed,oallinensandpurposes,abook,ouofwhichheisdoomedoreadedioushomiliesodisasingschoolboys——vacaionshemselvesarenoohim,heisonlyraherworseoffhanbefore;formonlybehassomeinrusiveupperboyfaseneduponhimasuchimes;somecadeofagreafamily;someneglecedlumpofnobiliy,orgenry;hahemusdragaferhimohepy,ohepanorama,omrbarleysorrery,ohepanopicon,orinohecounry,oafriendshouse,orohisfavouriewaeringpcewhereverhegoes,hisuneasyshadowaendshimaboyisahisboard,andinhispah,andinallhismovemensheisboyrid,sickofperpeualboy

boysarecapialfellowsinheirownway,amongheirmaes;buheyareunwholesomepanionsforgrownpeopleheresrainisfelnolessonheoneside,hanonheoher——evenachild,ha”pyhingforanhour,”iresalwayshenoisesofchildren,pyingheirownfancies——asinowhearkenohembyfis,sporingonhegreenbeforemywindow,whileiamengagedinhesegravespecuionsamyneasuburbanrereaashacklewell——bydisancemademoreswee——inexpressiblyakefromhebourofmyaskiislikewriingomusicheyseemomoduemyperiodsheyoughaleasodoso——forinhevoiceofhaenderagehereisakindofpoery,farunlikeheharshproseaccensofmansconversaion——ishouldbuspoilheirspor,anddiminishmyownsympahyforhem,byminglinginheirpasime

iwouldnobedomesicaedallmydayswihapersonofverysuperiorcapaciyomyown——no,ifiknowmyselfaall,fromanyconsideraionsofjealousyorselfparison,forheoccasionalmunionwihsuchmindshasconsiuedheforuneandfeliciyofmylife——buhehabiofooconsaninercoursewihspirisaboveyou,inseadofraisingyou,keepsyoudownoofrequendosesoforiginalhinkingfromohers,resrainwhalesserporionofhafaculyyoumaypossessofyourownyougeenangledinanohermansmind,evenasyouloseyourselfinanohermansgroundsyouarewalkingwihaallvarle,whosesridesoupaceyoursossiudeheconsanoperaionofsuchpoenagencywouldreduceme,iamconvinced,oimbeciliyyoumayderivehoughsfromohers;yourwayofhinking,hemouldinwhichyourhoughsarecas,musbeyourowninellecmaybeimpared,bunoeachmansinellecualframe

aslileasishouldwishobealwayshusdraggedupwards,aslile(orrahersillless)isidesirableobesuneddownwardsbyyourassociaesherumpedoesnomoresunyoubyisloudness,hanawhispereasesyoubyisprovokinginaudibiliy

whyareweneverquieaoureaseinhepresenceofaschoolmaser?——becauseweareconscioushaheisnoquieahiseaseinoursheisawkward,andouofpce,inhesocieyofhisequalsheeslikegulliverfromamonghislilepeople,andheca

ofihesaureofhisundersandingoyoursheca

omeeyouonhesquarehewansapoingivenhim,likeanindifferenwhispyerheissousedoeaching,hahewansobeeachingyouoneofheseprofessors,uponmypininghaheselileskechesofminewereanyhingbumehodical,andhaiwasunableomakehemoherwise,kindlyofferedoinsrucmeinhemehodbywhichyounggenlemeninhisseminarywereaughoposeenglishhemes——hejessofaschoolmaserarecoarse,orhinheydonoellouofschoolheisunderheresrainofaformanddidacivehypocrisyinpany,asaclergymanisunderamoraloneheca

omorelehisinelleclooseinsociey,hanheohercanhisinclinaions——heisforlornamonghiscoevals;hisjuniorsca

obehisfriends

”iakebmeomyself,”saidasensiblemanofhisprofession,wriingoafriendrespecingayouhwhohadquiedhisschoobruply——”hayournephewwasnomoreaachedomebupersonsinmysiuaionaremoreobepiied,hancanwellbeimaginedwearesurroundedbyyoung,and,consequenly,ardenlyaffecionaehears,buweca

everhopeoshareanaomofheiraffecionshereionofmaserandschorforbidshishowpleasinghismusbeoyou,howienvyyourfeelings,myfriendswillsomeimessayome,whenheyseeyoungmen,whomihaveeducaed,reurnafersomeyearsabsencefromschool,heireyesshiningwihpleasure,whileheyshakehandswihheiroldmaser,bringingapresenofgameome,oraoyomywife,andhankingmeinhewarmesermsformycareofheireducaionaholidayisbeggedforheboys;hehouseisasceneofhappiness;i,only,amsadahear——hisfinespiriedandwarmhearedyouh,whofanciesherepayshismaserwihgraiudeforhecareofhisboyishyears——hisyoungman——inheeighlongyearsiwachedoverhimwihaparensanxiey,nevercouldrepaymewihonelookofgenuinefeelinghewasproud,whenipraised;hewassubmissive,whenireprovedhim;buhedidneverloveme——andwhahenowmisakesforgraiudeandkindnessforme,isbuhepleasansensaion,whichallpersonsfeerevisiinghesceneofheirboyishhopesandfears;andheseeingonequalermshemanheywereaccusomedolookupowihreverencemywifeoo,”hisineresingcorrespondengoesonosay,”myoncedarlinga

a,ishewifeofaschoolmaser——whenimarriedher——knowinghahewifeofaschoolmaseroughobeabusynoablecreaure,andfearinghamygenlea

awouldillsupplyhelossofmydearbuslingmoher,jushendead,whoneversasill,wasineveryparofhehouseinamomen,andwhomiwasobligedsomeimesohreaenofasendowninachair,osaveherfromfaiguingherselfodeah——iexpressedmyfears,haiwasbringingherinoawayoflifeunsuiableoher;andshe,wholovedmeenderly,promisedformysakeoexerherselfoperformheduiesofhernewsiuaionshepromised,andshehaskepherwordwhawonderswillnowomansloveperform?——myhouseismanagedwihaproprieyanddecorum,unknowninoherschools;myboysarewellfed,lookhealhy,andhaveeveryproperacmodaion;andallhisperformedwihacarefuleconomy,haneverdescendsomea

essbuihavelosmygenle,helplessa

a!——whenwesidownoenjoyanhourofreposeaferhefaigueofheday,iampelledolisenowhahavebeenheruseful(andheyarereallyuseful)employmenshroughheday,andwhasheproposesforheromorrowsaskherhearandherfeauresarechangedbyheduiesofhersiuaionoheboys,sheneverappearsoherhanhemaserswife,andshelooksupomeasheboysmaser;owhomallshowofloveandaffecionwouldbehighlyimproper,andunbeinghedigniyofhersiuaionandmineyehismygraiudeforbidsmeohinoherformysakeshesubmiedobehisaleredcreaure,andcanireproachherfori?”——forhemunicaionofhisleer,iamindebedomycousinbridge