作者:查尔斯·兰姆
|类型:都市·校园
|更新时间:2019-10-06 20:36
|本章字节:17740字
misakemeno,reader,——norimagihaiambynauredesiueofhoseexeriorwinappendages,hangingornamens,and(archiecurallyspeaking)handsomevoluesohehumancapialbeermymoherhadneverborneme——iam,ihink,raherdelicaelyhancopiouslyprovidedwihhoseconduis;andifeelnodisposiionoenvyhemuleforhispleny,orhemoleforherexacness,inhoseingeniousbyrinhineinles——hoseindispensablesideinelligencers
neiherhaveiincurred,ordoneanyhingoincur,wihdefoe,hahideousdisfiguremen,whichconsrainedhimodrawuponassurance——ofeel”quieunabashed,”andaeaseuponhaaricleiwasnever,ihankmysars,inhepillory;nor,ifireadhemarigh,isiwihinhepassofmydesiny,haievershouldbe
whenhereforeisayhaihavenoear,youwillundersandmeomean——formusic——osayhahishearnevermeledaheconcourseofsweesounds,wouldbeafoulselflibel——”waerparedfromhesea”neverfailsomoveisrangelysodoes”ininfancy”buheywereusedobesungaherharpsichord(heoldfashionedinsrumeninvogueinhosedays)byagenlewoman——hegenles,sure,haevermeriedheappelion——hesweees——whyshouldihesiaeonamemrss——,oncehebloomingfa
yweaheralofheemplewhohadpowerohrillhesoulofelia,smallimpashewas,eveninhislongcoas;andomakehimglow,remble,andblushwihapassion,hanofainlyindicaedhedayspringofhaabsorbingsenimen,whichwasaferwardsdesinedooverwhelmandsubduehisnaurequie,foralicew——n
ievenhinkhasenimenallyiamdisposedoharmonybuorganicallyiamincapableofauneihavebeenpracising”godsaveheking”allmylife;whislingandhummingofioveromyselfinsoliarycorners;andamnoyearrived,heyellme,wihinmanyquaversofiyehahheloyalyofelianeverbeenimpeached
iamnowihoususpicion,haihaveanundevelopedfaculyofmusicwihinmefor,hrumming,inmywildwayonmyfriendaspiano,heohermorning,whilehewasengagedinanadjoiningparlor,——onhisreurn,hewaspleasedosay,”hehoughicouldnobehemaid!”onhisfirssurpriseahearinghekeysouchedinsomewhaanairyandmaserfulway,nodreamingofme,hissuspicionshadlighedonje
ybuagrace,snachedasuperiorrefinemen,soonconvincedhimhasomebeing,——echnicallyperhapsdeficien,buhigherinformedfromaprinciplemonoallhefinears,——hadswayedhekeysoamoodwhichje
y,wihallher(lessculivaed)enhusiasm,couldneverhaveeliciedfromhemimenionhisasaproofofmyfriendsperaion,andnowihanyviewofdisparagingje
y
scienificallyicouldneverbemadeoundersand(yehaveiakensomepains)whaanoeinmusicis;orhowonenoeshoulddifferfromanohermuchlessinvoicescanidisinguishasopranofromaenoronlysomeimeshehoroughbassiconriveoguessa,fromisbeingsupereminenlyharshanddisagreeableiremble,however,formymisapplicaionofhesimplesermsofhawhichidiscimwhileiprofessmyignorance,iscarceknowwhaosayiamignoranofihae,perhaps,bymisnomerssosenuoandadagiosandinhelikereionofobscuriyome;andsol,fa,mi,re,isasconjuringasbaraliponiishardosandalone——inanagelikehis,——(consiuedohequickandcriicalpercepionofallharmoniousbinaions,iverilybelieve,beyondallprecedingages,sincejubalsumbleduponhegamu)oremain,asiwere,singlyunimpressibleohemagicinfluencesofanar,whichissaidohavesuchanespecialsrokeasoohing,elevaing,andrefininghepassionsyeraherhanbreakhecandidcurrenofmyconfessions,imusavowoyou,haihavereceivedagreadealmorepainhanpleasurefromhissocriedupfaculyiamconsiuionallysuscepibleofnoisesacarpenershammer,inawarmsummernoon,willfremeinomorehanmidsummermadnessbuhoseunco
eced,unsesoundsarenohingohemeasuredmaliceofmusicheearispassiveohosesinglesrokes;willinglyenduringsripes,whileihahnoaskoconomusicica
obepassiveiwillsrive——minealeaswill——spieofisinapiude,ohridhemaze;likeanunskilledeyepainfullyporinguponhieroglyphicsihavesahroughanialianopera,ill,forsheerpain,andinexplicableanguish,ihaverushedouinohenoisiespcesofhecrowdedsrees,osocemyselfwihsounds,whichiwasnoobligedofollow,andgeridofhedisracingormenofendless,fruiless,barrenaenion!iakerefugeinheunpreendingassembgeofhonesmonlifesounds;——andhepurgaoryofheenragedmusicianbeesmyparadise
ihavesaaanoraorio(haprofanaionofhepurposesofhecheerfulpyhouse)wachinghefacesofheaudioryinhepi(whaaconrasohogarhsughingaudience!)immoveable,oraffecingsomefainemoion,——ill(assomehavesaid,haouroccupaionsinhenexworldwillbebuashadowofwhadelighedusinhis)ihaveimaginedmyselfinsomecoldheareinhades,wheresomeofheformsofheearhlyoneshouldbekepup,wihnoneofheenjoymen;orlikeha——
paryinaparlour,
allsilen,andalldamned!
aboveall,hoseinsufferableconceros,andpiecesofmusic,asheyarecalled,dopgueandembiermyapprehension——wordsaresomehing;buobeexposedoanendlessbaeryofmeresounds;obelongadying,oliesrecheduponarackofroses;okeepupnguorbyuninermiedeffor;opilehoneyuponsugar,andsugaruponhoney,oaninerminableedioussweeness;ofillupsoundwihfeeling,andsrainideasokeeppacewihi;ogazeonempyframes,andbeforcedomakehepicuresforyourself;oreadabook,allsops,andbeobligedosupplyheverbalmaer;oinvenexemporeragediesoanswerohevaguegesuresofaninexplicableramblingmime——hesearefainshadowsofwhaihaveundergonefromaseriesofheablesexecuedpiecesofhisempyinsrumenalmusic
idenyno,hainheopeningofaconcer,ihaveexperiencedsomehingvaslylullingandagreeable:——aferwardsfollowehhenguor,andheoppressionlikehadisappoiningbookinpamos;or,likeheingsonofmencholy,describedbyburon,dohmusicmakeherfirsinsinuaingapproaches——”mospleasaniisosuchasaremencholygiven,owalkaloneinsomesoliarygrove,bewixwoodandwaer,bysomebrookside,andomediaeuponsomedelighsomeandpleasansubjec,whichshalffechimmos,amabilisinsania,andmenisgraissimuserroramosinparabledelighobuildcaslesinheair,ogosmilingohemselves,acinganinfinievarieyofpars,whichheysuppose,andsronglyimagine,heyac,orhaheyseedone——sodelighsomeheseoysafirs,heycouldspendwholedaysandnighswihousleep,evenwholeyearsinsuchconempions,andfanasicalmediaions,whicharelikesomanydreams,andwillhardlybedrawnfromhem——windingandunwindinghemselvesassomanyclocks,andsillpleasingheirhumours,unishesceurnsuponasudden,andheybeingnowhabiaedosuchmediaionsandsoliarypces,canendurenopany,canhinkofnohingbuharshanddisasefulsubjecsfear,sorrow,suspicion,subrusicuspudor,disconen,cares,andwearinessoflife,surprisehemonasudden,andheycanhinkofnohingelse:coninuallysuspecing,nosoonerareheireyesopen,buhisinfernalpgueofmencholyseizehonhem,anderrifiesheirsouls,represeningsomedismalobjecoheirminds;whichnow,bynomeans,nobour,nopersuasionsheycanavoid,heyca
oberidofi,heca
oresis”
somehinglikehis”sceurning”ihaveexperiencedaheeveningparies,ahehouseofmygoodcaholicfriendnov——;who,byheaidofacapialorgan,himselfhemosfinishedofpyers,convershisdrawingroominoachapel,hisweekdaysinosundays,andheseerinominorheavens
[foonoe]ihavebeenhere,andsillwouldgo;
islikealileheavenbelow——drwas
whenmyfriendmencesupononeofhosesolemnanhems,whichperadvenuresruckuponmyheedlessear,ramblinginhesideaislesofhedimabbey,somefiveandhiryyearssince,wakinganewsense,andpuingasoulofoldreligioninomyyoungapprehension——(wheheribeha,inwhichhepsalmis,wearyofhepersecuionsofbadmen,wishehohimselfdoveswings——orhaoher,which,wihalikemeasureofsobrieyandpahos,inquirehbywhameansheyoungmanshallbescleansehismind)——aholycalmpervadehme——iamforheime——
rapaboveearh,
andpossessjoysnopromisedamybirh
buwhenhismaserofhespell,noconenohaveidasoulprosrae,goeson,inhispower,oinflicmoreblisshanliesinhercapaciyoreceive,impaienoovereher”earhly”wihhis”heavenly,”——sillpouringin,forproracedhours,freshwavesandfreshfromheseaofsound,orfromhainexhausedgermanocean,abovewhich,inriumphanprogress,dolphinseaed,ridehosearionshaydnandmozar,wihheiraendanrions,bach,beehoven,andacounlessribe,whomoaemporeckonupwouldbuplungemeagaininhedeeps,isaggerunderheweighofharmony,reelingoandfroamywisend;——clouds,asoffrankincense,oppressme——priess,alars,censers,dazzlebeforeme——hegeniusofhisreligionhahmeinheroils——ashadowyripleiarainvesshebrowofmyfriend,esonaked,soingenuous——heispope,——andbyhimsis,likeasinheanomalyofdreams,ashepopeoo,——ricoroedlikehimself!——iamconvered,andyeaproesan——aoncemalleushereicorum,andmyselfgrandheresiarch:orhreeheresiescenreinmyperson——iammarcion,ebion,andcerinhus——gogandmagog——whano?——illheinginofhefriendlysupperraydissipaeshefigmen,and,adraughofrueluheranbeer(inwhichchieflymyfriendshowshimselfnobigo)aoncereconcilesmeoheraionaliiesofapurerfainandresoresomehegenuineunerrifyingaspecsofmypleasancounenancedhossandhosess